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The Need For Sweets

In the midst of every diet (in my case trying to refrain from the daily intake of sweets), there comes a moment where your body says, “I really- REALLY- need something sweet to eat.  Now.”  Oh, the things you will do in that moment.

This craving- this intense need- hit me as I drove home.  It was after nine at night and I was tired.  I tried to rationalize this craving away (“I’m just tired”), but logic was no match for this craving.  I just didn’t need something sweet to eat, I wanted something sweet to eat.  If a 7-11 had appeared in my path, I would’ve veered into the parking lot and purchased a bag of M&M’s.  If a Dairy Queen had materialized before me, it would not have been a pretty sight.

I speak from experience.

Calm down, I told myself.  I didn’t need to binge on sweets (and then feel a little guilty afterwards- only a little).  I just needed a little something sweet to satisfy that longing.  I thought of the perfect idea- a spoonful of peanut butter with a couple of chocolate chips on top.  That would do it.  I didn’t need a bowl of ice cream (although that sounded good), a half dozen chocolate chip cookies (that sounded really good, particularly if they were homemade and just out of the oven), or even a bag of M&M’s or Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.

Just a spoonful of peanut butter with a couple chocolate chips (not a handful, just a couple).  Simple.  Quick.  Not too much.

And I knew we had an open bag of chocolate chips in the pantry.  I knew it.  In my mind, I could see the yellow bag on the second shelf from the top next to the brown sugar.

I knew wrong.  My memory had lied to me.

Somebody in our house must’ve eaten them.  Yeah, somebody.

But we did have two full un-opened bags of chocolate chips.  I could open one of them.  I could, but that might be a bad idea.  Until that bag was emptied, until every morsel had been devoured, my mind would know, fixate even, on the fact that there was an open bag of chocolate chips in the pantry.  This one time thing would become a daily occurrence.

I would not, I could not, open that bag.

But I really needed something sweet to eat.  I opened the freezer and stared at the cartons of ice cream.  We had vanilla, chocolate, banana pudding, and cookies’n’cream.  Just one bowl…

And then I had another idea.  I knew what I could do.  I could still fulfill this craving for sweets.

I grabbed the peanut butter from the pantry and a spoon from the drawer.  I opened the refrigerator and located the chocolate syrup.  I’d never tried this before, so there was a momentary pause as I wondered if this might be good.

If?  I was mixing chocolate and peanut butter, how could it not be good?

I dipped the spoon into the jar of peanut butter and I drizzled a little (really it was only a little) chocolate syrup onto the spoon.  I ate the entire spoonful in one bite.  Yes, it was good.  So good that I had another spoonful.

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